Mother’s Day and Father’s Day have always felt… different for me.
I don’t talk about it often—not because I’m hiding anything, but because it’s just been my normal: I grew up with a single dad. My mom passed away when I was very young. I have some vague memories of her, so I know my story—but it’s always been my dad and me.
So parenting holidays have always landed in a bit of a gray area.
As a kid, I made cards for grandmas and aunts. As I got older, I celebrated my dad. And now, as a single mom by choice, I think about how my twins will one day experience these same holidays. Their story will be different than mine—but also rooted in the same idea: one parent, deeply loved.
Through all of it, I’ve learned to focus on what we have—not what’s missing.
Tips for Celebrating Chosen Family on Parenting Holidays
If your family doesn’t fit the traditional mold, here are some ways to make these holidays feel meaningful:
1. Celebrate Who Shows Up
Whether it’s a grandparent, close friend, or someone else in your village—honor the people who love and support your child. Titles matter less than presence.
2. Make Your Own Traditions
Forget the formula. We celebrated Father’s Day yesterday with my dad—just a relaxed, intentional day together. Keep it simple and true to your family.
3. Be Honest When It Feels Right
My kids aren’t old enough to understand their story yet, but I don’t hide it. I’m open about being a single mom by choice with people in my life and those I meet. I believe in normalizing all kinds of families.
4. Plan Ahead for Inclusive Celebrations
My plan is to involve my kids in how we celebrate these holidays as they get older—whether it’s honoring our family or making space to celebrate someone in our village who plays a meaningful role.
5. Focus on What You’re Building
These holidays are a good moment to check in with yourself: Am I creating a family life rooted in love, stability, and joy? Am I showing my kids that our version of family is just as worthy of celebration?
These days may look different for us, but that doesn’t make them any less meaningful. Families come in all shapes—and love doesn’t need to fit a mold to be celebrated.
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